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Mar. 3rd, 2024 08:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ravena_kadeMy cousins are really loosing it. Lead cousin is just steps away from a breakdown she is so stressed.
The contractor cousin is their brother. 9 days ago his doctor sent him to a hospital because he was having congestive heart failure. They sent him to South Shore Hospital. It's the place that treated my mom so badly. At first the story was that he didnt have any heart damage. I asked if he had certain tests that my Dad did. They said no damage...but he had fluid overload and they didnt know why. They checked his kidney function as well. Then his sisters told me that his EF rate was 10%. Umm...Dad's is 15% and normal is Over 50% depending on age so there is heart damage. Then Friday he has been transferred to Boston. In the actual building I work in. I texted his wife and said that if you need help getting around or finding things just let me know. Im in the building. She texted Thank you back.
Today Dad is planning on going to the cousins to watch a ball game. I get a text saying that lead cousin and younger cousin are taking my aunt to Boston to see her son. Would I come over too so I could watch the sister with the back issues as she would be home with Dad, but she needs help going to the bathroom. Okay. I went. They were not leaving until after lunch. When we got there there as all sorts of screaming. My aunt had forgotten she already washed up, but washed up again. She was refusing to drink and was confused... they think from dehydration. She was not yelling. Lead cousin and younger cousin were. I I went in an talked with my aunt and prompted her to get dressed. She wanted to wash her face...I know it was again but so what. I went with her to the bathroom and gave her a fresh cloth and since I was there she washed her face , returned to her room and then got dressed. I walked her to the family room with the others. Lunch was ordered, then I went to chat with cousin with the bad back. We chatted for about 25 minutes. The food came and then my Aunt wasn't hungry anymore...and so the lead cousin started screaming. And then the younger cousin started screaming. And the all of a sudden they started throwing sandwiches. And lead cousin stormed upstairs. Younger cousin started yelling at the mother because she needed to eat... Bad back cousin got out of bed and started to yell at younger cousin as yelling wasn't helping. I picked up sandwiches off the floor and then went to see if my aunt was okay. She was just confused ... but with it enough to say she wasn't going to eat if she wasn't hungry. Oi.
Ten minutes later lead cousin, younger cousin and aunt left to drive to the Boston hospital to see contractor cousin. I asked bad back cousin if it was wise for lead cousin to drive after being so upset. She could drive into a wall. She said she should be fine. I asked if she understood that lead cousin showing signs of mental instability?
After 3 hours they come back. This time bickering, not yelling. It seems my aunt had been hallucinating at the hospital that her husband was there. My Uncle died back in 1984 of cancer. The cousins were saying it was because she was not drinking. Oi. My aunt sat down and I asked if I could get her something to drink. She said yes and that she was hungry. I asked the cousins if I could get her sandwich for her...it was the only one not thrown on the floor earlier. In chatting with my Aunt she mentioned that she saw my Uncle a couple times. The cousins are making "crazy" gestures.
Stupid Stupid cousins. They don't know some elderly people see their loved ones close to when it is time to go. They are so caught up in the duty of eating and drinking and bathing and crap...that they are not paying attention to signs of "soon"
The house is like bedlam.
The contractor cousin is their brother. 9 days ago his doctor sent him to a hospital because he was having congestive heart failure. They sent him to South Shore Hospital. It's the place that treated my mom so badly. At first the story was that he didnt have any heart damage. I asked if he had certain tests that my Dad did. They said no damage...but he had fluid overload and they didnt know why. They checked his kidney function as well. Then his sisters told me that his EF rate was 10%. Umm...Dad's is 15% and normal is Over 50% depending on age so there is heart damage. Then Friday he has been transferred to Boston. In the actual building I work in. I texted his wife and said that if you need help getting around or finding things just let me know. Im in the building. She texted Thank you back.
Today Dad is planning on going to the cousins to watch a ball game. I get a text saying that lead cousin and younger cousin are taking my aunt to Boston to see her son. Would I come over too so I could watch the sister with the back issues as she would be home with Dad, but she needs help going to the bathroom. Okay. I went. They were not leaving until after lunch. When we got there there as all sorts of screaming. My aunt had forgotten she already washed up, but washed up again. She was refusing to drink and was confused... they think from dehydration. She was not yelling. Lead cousin and younger cousin were. I I went in an talked with my aunt and prompted her to get dressed. She wanted to wash her face...I know it was again but so what. I went with her to the bathroom and gave her a fresh cloth and since I was there she washed her face , returned to her room and then got dressed. I walked her to the family room with the others. Lunch was ordered, then I went to chat with cousin with the bad back. We chatted for about 25 minutes. The food came and then my Aunt wasn't hungry anymore...and so the lead cousin started screaming. And then the younger cousin started screaming. And the all of a sudden they started throwing sandwiches. And lead cousin stormed upstairs. Younger cousin started yelling at the mother because she needed to eat... Bad back cousin got out of bed and started to yell at younger cousin as yelling wasn't helping. I picked up sandwiches off the floor and then went to see if my aunt was okay. She was just confused ... but with it enough to say she wasn't going to eat if she wasn't hungry. Oi.
Ten minutes later lead cousin, younger cousin and aunt left to drive to the Boston hospital to see contractor cousin. I asked bad back cousin if it was wise for lead cousin to drive after being so upset. She could drive into a wall. She said she should be fine. I asked if she understood that lead cousin showing signs of mental instability?
After 3 hours they come back. This time bickering, not yelling. It seems my aunt had been hallucinating at the hospital that her husband was there. My Uncle died back in 1984 of cancer. The cousins were saying it was because she was not drinking. Oi. My aunt sat down and I asked if I could get her something to drink. She said yes and that she was hungry. I asked the cousins if I could get her sandwich for her...it was the only one not thrown on the floor earlier. In chatting with my Aunt she mentioned that she saw my Uncle a couple times. The cousins are making "crazy" gestures.
Stupid Stupid cousins. They don't know some elderly people see their loved ones close to when it is time to go. They are so caught up in the duty of eating and drinking and bathing and crap...that they are not paying attention to signs of "soon"
The house is like bedlam.
no subject
Date: 2024-03-04 08:22 am (UTC)I hope they start taking better care of your aunt. :o
Hugs, Jon
no subject
Date: 2024-03-04 09:53 am (UTC)I guess it upsets me so because I know my Mom was mad at me when I had to sign the papers to let her go. My Grandmother was mad and scared. It bothers me. But I suppose the cousins will paint themselves as saints in the end.
no subject
Date: 2024-03-04 09:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-03-04 11:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-03-04 11:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-03-04 12:43 pm (UTC)You are wise not to get too involved. Especially in the food fight parts.
no subject
Date: 2024-03-04 01:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-03-04 01:31 pm (UTC)Hugs
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Date: 2024-03-04 04:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-03-04 05:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2024-03-06 09:15 pm (UTC)They don't know some elderly people see their loved ones close to when it is time to go.
I hope she goes peacefully in her sleep, with minimal family drama.