(no subject)

[ravena_kade]

The wedding finally came and has gone. The wedding itself was beautiful. The Bride and Groom charming and appreciative of all their guests. The Priest had a lovely message and shared memories from his life that pertained to the ceremony of marriage.

The bad was the total chaos of the cousin. Np surprise. I have travelled with a sword group and those road trips were simple by comparison. I have volunteered with a friend and taken a dozen developmentally and physically challenged adults on trips and it was fine. This was just so ...so...sooooo.....

Friday we left to go from Boston to Worcester to the hotel. It's only 1. hours, but no one can follow directions. I know where I am going, but no one listens. When we arrived to a restaurant for lunch I help the 96 year old to the rest room. She soiled herself. I clean her up. Sigh, but it is what it is. Do it quietly and allow her dignity. Then the cousins ask me to take stroke cousin to the rest room. She can't open doors or sit down without help. We go in and I get her situated and she tells me she needs to be changed. She wet her undergarment 6 times in the trip. She had a clean on in her bag, but nothing to put the soiled one in. She just wanted to leave it on the floor...NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooo. I swear the depends weighed 6 pounds... ad I got wet. Sigh. Then we go to the table, but the chairs are too high. They tried a booth but we couldn't fit her in. They had high tops but she couldn't fit in that either. Finally someone brought out a chair from the kitchen and it worked. Sigh. Every time we stopped for food for the weekend it was the same.

At the wedding they sat me in between the 96 year old and the stroke cousin. I cut up the 96 year olds steak for her. As I ate stroke cousin pushed my plate and pushed hers towards me and said "Cut my food". No please or thank you. And when she wanted things she would poke me with her cane. She also spilled coffee on my new coat.

Today was check out day. Dad and I were ready at 8 AM...we could have been out of there at 5 AM, but spinal surgery cousin was riding with us. We left at 10 AM did not get home until 4:40 PM because of bathroom breaks and stopping for lunch...where we had the chair issues again. I think I was frothing at the mouth when I got home.

I am truly surprised lead cousin hasn't snapped yet. She deals with this all the time. While I like to think I play well with others, in the end I am not a heard animal.

Comments

[kaishin108]

Oh my gosh. I guess you were the babysitter :(

I'm sorry about your new coat, hope it comes out.

[palusbuteo]

Egads. that sucks.

[fionaniconnor]

Wow. Just... wow.

[gwendraith]

Wow, that sounds...tough. I seriously am in awe of your ability to deal with all that you do, I think I might have lost it and walked away. I hope your coat can be cleaned okay. Hugs.

[ravena_kade]

I lost it a few times back at the hotel room with my Dad.

I want to do things with him while he is healthy enough to do things, ut he wants to be with the cousins and their chaos is totally ridiculous.

[fbhjr]

Wow! I'm sorry it all went down like that.

You are a saint for putting up with it. I would have walked home from Worcester rather than be treated that way.

[ravena_kade]

I could walk to the train station from the hotel room. I didn't do it because Sunday they shut down parts of the pike and Dad wouldn't have been able to figure out an alternate route . We had one of the cousins in the car so we had to go back t their house.

[disneydream06]

Were you invited to the wedding just to take care of the cousins? UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HUGS, Jon

[ravena_kade]

the bride had no idea of the state of the cousins.

[disneydream06]

I think the rest of that bunch is taking advantage of you. :o

[malterre]

Wow, what a callous disregard of their own family members.
You definitely earned an attaboy, but OMG.
Hugs

[ravena_kade]

The big problem is that the sisters are tired and the stroke sister is almost impossible to take care of. She deliberatley doesn't use the bathroom and expects her sisters to clean her up 5 to 7 times a day. She refuses to sit anywhere but the front seat and forces the 96 year old in the back. She has demanded that the 96 year od be put in a nursing home. She should not have been released from the rehab.

[chris_warrior]

i swear to God, i would have bolted. i'm so sorry it went that badly; they have absolutely NO business expecting you to do all that for them. they need a home healthcare aid. i'm livid... and i've done all that for my dad.

[ravena_kade]

Sadly stroke sister should have never been released from the rehab.

The lead cousin is trying to take care of both the 96 year old and her sister with cancer. Stroke sister had no business going to that house to recover.

There is a personal care attendant that comes in to shower stroke sister 3 times a week, but she needs 2 to 3 showers a day to clean up since she is not toileting correctly. Her sister actually has to get in the shower with her to clean her up properly. It's made harder as she is about 38o pounds

[guy_todd]

Maybe bring swords to the next gathering? :\

[ravena_kade]

Im thinking of almond flavored cookies....

[brickhousewench]

Wow, just wow.

There's being helpful and then there's being taken advantage of by selfish, inconsiderate people.