ravena_kade

Tue, 07 Apr 2026 00:12:54 GMT

My Sister's partner was laid off today. A severance of 3 weeks and her healthcare ends Friday. I feel really bad. I will ask if they need to go home a week early. It will save them some money. Dad won't be happy alone, but he is able to be alone. He just can't drive yet. He understands the money issue.

They really liked the Tuscan style ribs. I thought they were good, but could be better. I need a spice grinder for the rub as I don't have the patience to pound it out with a mortar and pestle. The glaze was a mix of homey and balsamic vinegar with Rosemary. I only had dry rosemary. Next time I will use fresh.

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Mon, 06 Apr 2026 00:55:41 GMT

Dad and sister wanted to go over to the cousins for Easter. I made a big salad and deviled eggs. The cousins ordered pasta and pizza. I sat in a corner and looked at my phone for a few hours.

I did buy myself a series of books as an Easter gift from my Dad.

The good news is that stroke cousin is moving into her assisted living studio apartment on Tuesday. The sisters can relax a bit and the hope is that once the stroke cousin is in a new environment that she will do her therapy and build new routines.

This week Dad has an appointment on Tuesday where they will take out his stitches. Hopefully they will also give him the equipment to shower with.

10 days until my sister leaves.

I don't want to go to work tomorrow. I'm tired of the boss putting me down and micromanaging without actually doing any training. It's discouraging.

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Sat, 04 Apr 2026 15:34:11 GMT

Dad is still doing well. I'm looking to send him back to work the second week in May. The only tricky thing is getting the blood thiner dose down. Food with vitamin K make your blood thicker. I find it discouraging as now not only can I not cook things with sodium, I no longer can cook greens and beans. He just eats what I put in front of him. The good thing is that they have lifted fluid restrictions so he can eat soup...even if it is flat soup. Once my sister goes I am meal prepping his food and freezing stuff for him. I need to eat what I want/need. Between cooking for him and my sister's partner I need therapy.

Sister leaves now on the 15th. There will be a couple days that Dad is alone, but he can handle it. Once he can drive we won't need a nurse coming to test his blood and we can find our new normal. I hope to be able to go away weekends come August. I want people to be comfortable with him. Right now people are nervous that his alarms will go off... kind of like a bomb. So far all has been good.

I am planning take a gouche class in May. I also need to get out in the yard. I hope we dont have as wet a spring as last year.

The boss is being a bit of a dick. She has higher expectations of the staff, but doesn't show up to train or enforce. The staff are resenting it. They figure that's why people left before. She said to me what she was here to kick ass and get me to learn. I told her to show up and teach...and I hoped she had steel toed boots because that tactic doesn't work with me. I will defend myself. Like I need this with my home situation right now.

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Tue, 31 Mar 2026 01:41:47 GMT

So my sister is leaving earlier and didn't bother to check to see if I had coverage for Dad's doctor's appointments that I was counting on her to help with. Sigh. I'm not sure just how things will be covered, but at least I only have 15 days left. I have been pulling 22 hour days since she arrived.

Dad seems okay. He is going to be a lone a few days before the 8 weeks recuperation is up. Not a lot I can do about it. After his 8 weeks I hope he is cleared to drive. He needs to go back to work as I can't cover all the house bills. Feeding my sister and partner has taken all my save money from Christmas that was to go to a camera. I am afraid of the water bill has she does laundry here constantly and uses the setting for bulky sheets for everything. She has also used 36 rolls of toilet paper and 24 rolls of paper towels.

In an effort to keep positive I can say that by her coming home, my Dad did not have to go into a rehab.

I have taken the Friday off after they leave and the following Monday is a holiday. I hope to sleep a bit and work in the yard if the weather cooperates.

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Sat, 28 Mar 2026 01:13:41 GMT

Another week done. It has been a month since Dad's open heart surgery. Things are mostly going well. We are now trying to get a handle on his blood thinner meds. His blood is a tad thick so no green veggies until his blood is thinner again.

Dad is getting tired of my Sister and partner's silliness and self centeredness. At least he is seeing it. It is exhausting me. They are here until April 16. 20 days.

Tomorrow they all want to go to Ipswich...Dad wants me to go too so I will. Maybe we can stop in a few shops while we are up there.

I need to get my taxes done. Hopefully I can book that tomorrow. I hope I get a refund this year. I could use it since I am paying all the house utility bills.

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Tue, 24 Mar 2026 01:32:03 GMT

Thursday will be 4 weeks since Dad's surgery. I think he is doing well. No mishaps.

I have 24 Days left with my sister being here. I am exhausted in trying to work around her and her partner. Sunday I wanted to stand in the living room and scream "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE". All she has to do is sit and watch TV with Dad ,ask him to walk around the living room 3 times a day, make sure he has lunch. It seems to be too much for her.

Saturday I asked that she come over and be with Dad as I was helping the cousins pack up some of stroke cousin's things so she can move into assisted living. I thought that by seeing their chaos I would feel better. They also need someone who can move things. It did put me in a better frame of mind until I got home. The thought was that my sister and partner would take Dad out for a ride and maybe go out to lunch. Dad asked if they could go to Ipswich. They did not pick up Dad until 3 PM (he was alone for 6 hours) and they took him to Walgreens (a drug store) in the next town over. He was out for 30 minutes. And when I came home I had to cook dinner.

Sunday they said they would take me grocery shopping. They did not show up until after 2. The store is about 1.5 miles from my house, but they don't like to go through busy intersections so they drove 6 miles out of the way to get there. The store was so crowded and the produce so picked over I wanted to cry. Then I went home and made 3 meals because there are two 4 PM doctor's appointments this week. They ate and left me with all the dishes. Before they left they complained that they were not getting enough sleep so they were going to leave Dad alone for 3 hours every day.

On Friday I will shop on my own at Trader Joes in town.

Meanwhile I can't focus on anything. I need to pay attention to financials and not cooking and cleaning. It's just that I am so tired once 2 PM hits. I hope I can focus tomorrow.

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Tue, 17 Mar 2026 01:00:16 GMT

Last night I slept in my bed a second time and I slept well. I get up at 3:30 AM for work. I go down to feed the cat and look in on Dad. I cannot see a power cord going from the wall to the bed. I took a fit. He went to sleep on a battery and I didn't know how much time was left. Turns out he changed the batteries and went to bed on them. You are not supposed to do that. IT is especially bad since all of his incisions are not healed that the batteries and cord can pull on them. He was mad that I was mad. I said that this is just another example that I could not trust him to follow the training that we had for this and it is extremely unfair to me.
I left to get ready for work, but turned around and took his keys off his dresser. He asked what I was doing. I told him that I could not trust him... and if he doesn't get his shit together he won't be released to drive again. If you can't follow instructions no one's going to let you drive. I left.

He told my sister that I was pissed at him. I was glad he remembered. My sister said he drank morentoday and ate normally.

Maybe taking his keys woke him up.

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Mon, 16 Mar 2026 01:01:04 GMT

17 Days post op. Dad physically is doing well. Yesterday I was alone with him all day and he would not do anything that he was supposed to do and was grouchy with me all day. They say this is common post op. It frustrates me and makes me feel like a servant. He would not get ready for bed so I could go to sleep myself. There is a specific process to bed time that involves changing over from battery to wall power. That and if he falls asleep in his chair and the batteries run out he could die.

He is also forgetting things. He forgot that my friend Evie had died. I said it was okay and that this is from the anesthesia... and he was mad at me. He is refusing to drink 2000ml of water. Before he would over drink and I would have to change meals and meds to deal with the fluid overload. Now it is important to drink to keep the pump going properly and he is refusing.

Today I was up at 6 AM and did chores until 7 PM. My SIL offered to take me to a market to bulk food buy, but they did not show up until after 2. A physical therapist called me before 8 AM today and wanted to come at 11. They tried to call my sister but didn't get an answer. I said it was because it is before 8 AM on a Sunday and she is probably still asleep.

I cooked a meal for the day we have a 3 PM dr appointment and then did fish for tonight. WE ate and they and they left. Leaving me with the dishes. So now I am buying food for 4 people while paying for everything in the house since Dad has no income. Cooking for 4 people and cleaning up after everyone. I am rather grouchy about the whole thing. This is not what I wanted.

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Fri, 13 Mar 2026 01:09:32 GMT

Dad had his first blood test to see if his blood is a good thinness for the heart pump. His numbers were great. The chest tube would look good as well. The LVad coordinator was pleased.

Sadly the VNA people never contacted us. The LVad coordinator was concerned as Dad was listed as a priority. My sister will try and track them down tomorrow.

My sister has been showing up before 5AM and been Dad sitting. I end up coming home and cooking Dinner. Her partner shows up, they eat, and then leave at 7. I am heading upstairs for 2 hours of me time after they leave.

Today the boss ticked me off. I was told to concentrate on Month end, but then she is mad that I actually concentrated on that and not some other thing. She also was mad that I didn't train a coworker on some invoices. Again I told her it was because she had told me to concentrate on Month End. Between my Dad and the antics of my sister and her partner, I have a short fuse. I am looking forward to the weekend.

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Thu, 12 Mar 2026 00:56:38 GMT

Dad came home yesterday. Late. Waiting for discharge at a hospital always takes forever.

Dad was only in 12 days after post op. He is the poster child for the LVad group. The only other person that could leave after 12 days was a 22 year old and that was five years ago.

I am sleeping on the sofa downstairs incase he gets tangled up in his 20ft electrical cord while sleeping.

All in all he is doing well.

AS for me, I am still exhausted. Yesterday I was not able to go to bed until 11 PM and I am up at 3:30 AM. I told my sister that they had to leave early so I could just go to bed/sofa.

This Saturday it is just me and Dad. My sister will be off visiting friends. I intend to nap on the sofa and maybe make some meals.

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Other things

Tue, 10 Mar 2026 01:42:34 GMT

So happy it's light later.

I want to walk the beach now that the snow is gone. I am waiting for the Osprey's to return.

I want to workin the garden. I want to plan a space for a bird feeder.

Once Dad's new chair arrives I need to call to have the old one removed and they will take the 210 pound TV so I can get out to my porch.

I do need to get my taxes done.

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Tue, 10 Mar 2026 01:25:22 GMT

Dad maybe coming home tomorrow. Te only thing that could stop him was a weepy wound from one of the chest tubes. They need to make sure it is not infected.

The PT people mentioned rehab because on Friday they walked Dad too close to the bed and he bumped into it and lost his balance. They also were concerned that he did not remember his room number. I explained that my sister was home on flea and he would not be going to a rehab. I explained that my Mother was contaminated in a rehab and because of a bump into a hospital bed I would not send him to one when he walked up a dozen stairs today without any issues. As far as the room number goes he has been in 5 different rooms in 10 days.

The LVad coordinator agreed with me and thought that getting him home would be best as everything is working fine. She also said that he was their new poster child and would like Dad to tell his story at a meeting. I told her that Dad wasn't a talker, but I would speak if she wanted.

I am hoping they keep him one or 2 more days. I don't want to deal with an infection when everything was clear yesterday morning.

Once he is home I can at least be home by 4 PM instead of 7:30 pm.

My sister's partner has agreed to drive my sister from Braintree to Quincy every morning at 4 AM and return to the hotel for the day. They are talking about leaving mid April . I have to put together a plan. I needed them for the 8 weeks, not 4. Maybe work 3 days remote and ask DQ or my Dad's sister to come over until the visiting nurse stops. They may need to sleep over if the nurse comes early. After this time he's alone ready or not. The big thing is that his sternum heals and we are 1.5 weeks in on that.

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Sat, 07 Mar 2026 15:16:48 GMT

It's been a week. Im still exhausted.

Dad is doing well. The whole med staff thinks he's a rock star. He refused pain meds 2 days after a surgery that carved out his heart, removed rib sections, and has an extension cord strung through his insides. He is doing so well that that he's scheduled to be released next week. It usually takes 3 weeks or a month after surgery. Usually only younger people get out this fast. They told him he could drive once his sternum heals.

All this physical stuff is great, but I see signs of confusion. This usually goes away a week after major surgery. I see tons of blood tests on his records and I see that blood glucose is high and other internal chemistry is still abnormal. This can cause a post op delirium. He is not delirious, but he's loosing time and he's called me his sister. He's called my sister's partner by the wrong name. This morning he called me 3 times; midnight, 3 AM and 6:30 AM. Other people are not seeing this because he is quiet, but I see it. And because of the way my friend Evie died I am hyper sensitive to it.

I do think once they get his chemistry settled he will settle in. Once he isn't laying in a hospital room all day I can get a better feel for it.

AS for me. I haven't strangled my sister. I nearly did on Wednesday when we got in and I am trying to put together a dinner for 3 before I leave for ceramics class. As I juggled dishes and things she is prancing around the kitchen and living room space. He is almost jogging with her hands held up and arms swinging. "What in blazes are you doing? And get the hell out of my way" She was exercising. Sigh. She is 60 years old. I pointed her to the treadmill in Dad's room and said that Ma would have stabbed her...

I am living on stress and Diet Pepsi. I need a root canal soon. I have active pain.

Oh Boy

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Sat, 28 Feb 2026 12:24:18 GMT

Dad woke up yesterday and they took out the breathing tube, Yay. Coming out of the anesthesia was rough. AS he woke he was in huge amounts of pain so they gave him a lot of pain meds. He was not making sense and we could not understand him. It was hard to see. He did try to crack a few jokes so that made me feel better.

They ended up cutting a 4 inch section of sternum, making a 4 inch incision under her heart, cut out 4 inches off a rib so the pump can fit, and then stuffed a 3 ft extension cord in his abdomen with a hole in his belly for it to come out. The nurses say he will be in pain for a while.

told my sister that I wanted to leave at 4 PM. I was going to take the train home. I want Dad to sleep with the pain meds. The medical staff would check for all the things that need checking to make sure he was neurologically okay. She and her partner said they would go at the same time and would drive me home. I offered a salad with shrimp and chicken for dinner. It took an hour to get back to my town, but they wanted to stop at the market. Okay. Then they spent 2 hour in the store. We didn't get back home until 7 and I had to do dinner. They did not leave until 8:30.

I told them I was visiting Dad for about an hour today and then going home. I have house things that I can't do if I am here and if I have people at the house. I need to warn all the bed linens for the guest bed for my sister, pay my Dad's bills and dig out the trash barrels and all sorts of crap. This is not a vacation for me. I need separate time and not be a host. I can't keep taking care of their needs and I am run into the ground with only 3 hours sleep a night.

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Fri, 27 Feb 2026 03:35:56 GMT

Dad went into surgery at 7:30 AM. The pre op nurse had him call me before he went in. It was nice to talk to him.

The operation was supposed to be 4 to 6 hours. It actually was 7. The surgeon called and said it went well, but he wasn't much of a talker so I got no details. I am concerned. We finally got to see him at 6, but he was not conscious. I am concerned. They had him zipped up in what looked like a heavy cotton sleeping bag and were blowing warm air in it. His color was good, but I did not want to stay long as I don't like seeing unconscious people like that. I watched 4 people die last year. I dont need to see it. They said that they would try and wake him up slowly since there is a lot of pain from the incisions. I will call the desk tomorrow at 8 am and see how he is then see him at 11.

My sister and partner are up to the same old shenanigans. It took us 2 hours to get home from the hospital last night because they refused to drive on the expressway or the Jamaica Way (another direct route to the hospital part of Boston. We went through every back residential street in Roxbury and Dorchester. It was ridiculous. Tonight I told them that if they did not go the Jamaica Way I would get out and Walt to the nearest train station.

Tonight the partner tells me she can't drive my sister back and forth to the hospital as she has to work and it will take 4 hours. Umm..Yeah. It's why I offered my house to you guys. Just what am I supposed to do with that info?

Then when the partner steps away my sister tells me that she may have to sleep over every night. Ummm... I asked you to tell me that a week ago so I could company clean the house. So now you are staying and paying for a hotel room. WTF.

Now I have to try to stay home and clean things and wash sheets and towels and stuff and get to the hospital. WTF

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Wed, 25 Feb 2026 02:32:07 GMT

The cousins showed up this morning to take Dad to the hospital. I waited to go with them as I was afraid they would call and say that their snow removal person didn't show up. They offered to take Dad and only told me that they would not shovel out on Sunday night. Oi. It only took 20 minutes to get in to Boston.

The boss had texted last night that the bank would open at 11. The others balked and she said 12. She said I could work at home. I reminded her that Dad needed to be at the hospital in the morning. Morning comes and the boss texted to see how things were and reminded people about getting in. I answered right away telling her that the trains are running slow, but I have a ride and I would be there at 7:30. No one else answered her until after 10. They asked what time they should leave their houses. They asked why they should come in for only a few hours. They asked what they should do if they were afraid. I texted the boss separately saying my Gen x brain is getting annoyed. The boss laughed. She then explained that a lot of local banks and credit unions were opening at 11. She was giving them almost 6 hours to get in, but if they were afraid then they could use unscheduled PTO. She also said that she would pay for them to park. One teller showed up and he actually asked if he had to open for customers. Oi Vey. The boss told me I could put in for a full day for yesterday (I worked until noon) and today and I could leave early to spend more time with Dad. She appreciated my work ethic.

Dad's surgery is Thursday. He is getting nervous. I am uneasy. The LVad team told us that Dad will be in a month and they were concerned that my sister was here too early. Yup, I know.

My sister is in Braintree. Not sure of her plans. I think she will come to Boston tomorrow to be with Dad. She wants to visit on Thursday before the surgery, but they are prepping him at 4 AM .

Tomorrow I need to send out a group text just letting people know what is going on. I dont want to, but I can't hack the constant phone calls.

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Mon, 23 Feb 2026 19:40:26 GMT

Right now Dad is still expected to be at the hospital at 8 AM. I am waiting for a phone call with instructions.

I told my sister not to leave Buffalo NY today. I told them yesterday not to even leave Wisconsin, but no one listens.

I don't know how I am going to shovel out the driveway alone. I need to go out and shovel so Dad can move his car up and then shovel out the rest of the driveway so a car can get out of the driveway.

The cousins are supposed to bring Dad to the hospital tomorrow as I leave for work at 5 AM. They will not go out tomorrow if their plow guy does not come over. They do not shovel. Dad wants me to go over and shovel their driveway WTF. It's also not safe enough to drive over to their house even if I was that stupid.

Dad is perfectly capable of driving tomorrow, but then I have to find 2 people to come and get the car as no one I know will take the trains. He won't take a cab or an Uber by himself.

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Mon, 23 Feb 2026 01:57:14 GMT

Today's Chinese food was really good. The time spent with the cousins was very very emotional and screamy.

I was filled in on the stroke cousin's situation. She has been scammed out of hundreds of thousands of dollars. Her bank accounts are overdrawn. She may only have a $15000 annuity left and social security.

She has not paid her rent in 2 months and her health insurance in 4 months. The sisters paid those.

I went to amazon and ordered her some of the undergarments she needs and called DQ to see if she could find 2x undergarments in her elder housing building...when people move out or pass away the often leave items in the common room for others to use. DQ found 2 cases.

There were several text conversations on her phone with scammers. The texts go back to Christmas time and she even gave the scammers her social security number. I read them OMG. Yesterday the sisters went to the police department to report the scam and as the detective read the texts he had his hands on his head and was saying NO NO NO NO NO... Since she gave it all away and was still her own guardian she probably won't get anything back.

Since we are getting a huge blizzard one of stroke cousin's church friends drove her to her sisters house to stay until after the storm. They are afraid that if she looses power that her Home Alone Alert bracelet will not work .

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Sun, 22 Feb 2026 13:53:13 GMT

Yesterday Dad and I went to Ipswich for lunch so he could have a cheat meal before his hospital stay. He had fried scallops (and extra fluid meds when he came home) and I had fried clams. It's nice to go there. The bartender saw us crossing the street and poured us our usuals; me a hard cider and Dad a diet Coke. This will most likely be the last time we are there until June. I know I will be there in the summer even if he is unable to drive.

On the way home we stoped at a giant Ace Hardware/Tractor supply store close by Ipswich. I stopped because the sign said that they had ice melt. The store was huge and had tons of things. I wanted to buy seed trays, but stopped because I really won't be able to pay attention to seeds in the next few weeks. I did buy myself a steel shovel. They are saying we could get a foot or more of snow. Maybe 2ft. Plastic shovels don't do a good job with the piles the plows leave in the driveway. I also have to carve out space for 2 cars this storm.

Tomorrow Dad has a 1 pm appointment, but I don't know if they will cancel. I don't think they call for cancels on Sunday. I know on Friday the hospital sent out emails that staff is supposed to show up and listed hotels that were nearby for Sunday night. Sadly the hospital does not pay for the hotel rooms. I may or may not get a text from my boss today. I have the ability to work remote only if the computer is on in the office. If the hospital cuts power then the office pcs all shut down. It happens a few times a month.

My sister's car died again. They were going to try and drive it here. It died yesterday and they got it to the mechanic 10 minutes before the guy closed. He said he really wouldn't make that drive as they could get stuck in the middle of nowhere. So last night at 8 pm they were looking for a car to rent. Umm.. the car broke down last week too and they hadn't started looking for a rental then? Oy. I told he that it would be okay if she had to come out a few days later... Nope. They are supposed to leave at noon today. Oy.

I also told them to check with me Monday morning before they leave their hotel. They stay in Buffalo. No need to leave at the crack of dawn if there is a raging blizzard. Stay as late as you can because the roads may be dangerous.

Today is Dad's last cheat day. Chinese food.

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Sat, 21 Feb 2026 14:27:55 GMT

Sooooo.....Dad goes in Tuesday and is watched and fine tuned for the procedure on Thursday. Thursday at 6;45 he is the first surgery of the day and they will apple core out his heart. Sigh. Part of me thinks Cyberman from Dr. Who. A friend said think Ironman...sure...but we are not rich people... although I would love a Jarvis.

The snow coming on Monday has me worried. A foot to 2 feet of snow. I am really not up to shoveling 2 feet of snow for 2 cars to fit in the driveway. My sister cannot park in front of the house now as we still have a 3 foot by 4 ft deep plow packed snow at the street. I also don't think her partner can make the swing into the driveway because of the snow mounds. Dad can, because he is still a super driver... and I hope he will be for a few more years.

Last night I had some hard news about the stroke cousin. She is moving into an assisted living place that I can walk to...that is not the bad news. Her sisters found out yesterday that her bank accounts are all overdrawn and she has had no money for a week for undergarments... think about that...or not. They also found out that she transferred $100,000 out of her 401k and that Well Fargo has no trail of where the money went. WTF. Cancer cousin is a vice president at a bank and cried BS and will bring a bank lawyer in to find out where the money went. OMG. They figured out that her social security and the pay outs from one annuity will cover her new rent...and that includes 3 meals a day at her new place. They are going to have to get power of attorney over their sister. Also, she has maxed out all credit cards. She spent $19000 on Amazon since November. It is so sad. It breaks my heart and scares the crap out of me.

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Wed, 18 Feb 2026 23:13:36 GMT

Yesterday I went and had Dad's taxes done... and that made me rather mad. His income is more than 60% more than I make and I have to fight him to pay for anything. If I made what he made he would not have to work. His money is blown and he refuses direct deposit so I can see what is going on. I told him fifths heart thing goes well I'm saying down his debt and making him by things for the house instead of me. I dont like getting mad right now as I dont know how next week will be... but I am still feeling used.

News on the sister is that their car is in the shop. It started leaking on Friday. Leaking? What? Gas? Good grief. I said that it would be okay if they came out later. She didn't comment on that. She said that they may rent a car. They are going to need to buy a car soon. Rent a car for 6 to 8 weeks, plus a hotel? (I guess Im the only poor one as I have to keep a crappy job to be at the hospital... yeah... mad...yeah). I called my Dad to tell him what is going on and to ask if my sister's partner could drive his car while they are here. I suggested that they rent a car to come out, dump it and drive Dad's car, and then rent a car to go back. It may save them money. I also offered the big empty house again to save them money if they have to buy a car. I can close the cat out of my apartment and vacuum everything. She said she would think about it. I know she won't, but I offered.

I wanted to say why dont you just take the money you will be blowing and send it here to hire someone to watch dad when he comes home... at least that person would be here...that would be mean. I'm annoyed... and I still really haven't got a handle on just what is going to happen. That and I am exhausted.

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Mon, 16 Feb 2026 16:51:07 GMT

A weekend of visits.

Friday I went over to DQs and put up a bunch of her framed art for her. I also brought home an antique lamp. It looks art deco bu it's probably from the 50s if I look at the wiring. It's lovely. I have always admired it. I may go over next Friday and put in her bedroom a/c because she keeps tripping on it. She said that she would watch my Dad if my sister bails on me. I may be able to even get her to stay over and sleep in the guest bed in my craft room.

Saturday I went with Dad to see his Sister before the surgery. She's 86 and isn't in great shape. I enjoy her a lot. I like talking to her husband, but he can be an old fart at time .hey wanted to go to eat and picked place in Salem. The food was excellent, but since it was Valentine's Day we had a wait. They said they wanted to help in case my Sister bails. I will take it in the Summer when I need a beach Day. At that point if something goes wrong it's just a call to 911 and send him to Boston.

Yesterday I went to the cousins just to fill them in and see my Aunt. She's 97, and while healthy, she is a fall risk. When her time comes I will never hear my Mother's voice again... Her and my Mother sounded a lot a like. The cousins told me they would help in case my sister bails. It's hard though. They are still dealing with stroke cousin whose behavior is deteriorating.

Stroke cousin's doctors have told her that she will never be able to drive and that she needs to live in assisted living. She refuses to sell her car and is over spending. Her Doctor's actually told her to stop listening to the crappy advice her friends are giving her and listen to her med team. It breaks my heart. She was smart, planned for her retirement, independent and travelled. Now she doesn't bath, won't change her clothes, has burned through her savings account buying junk on Amazon, and argues with her friends and family.

My sister has decided not to bring the dog. Their dog trainer felt that the dog wasn't behaved enough to go for such a long trip. She needs consistency. The dog trainer will take the dog and work with her. While my Sister and her partner are sad they will come home to a better trained dog. The dog will be with 6 other dogs and horses. She will be in a home and just sleep in her crate. It's better for her.

My sister is staying in Braintree. From Braintree to Boston will take them a few hours because they will leave at the highest commute time. All I can say is MORONS. Her partner will not want to come and get her and she will be a giant ball of anxiety when I dig her home on the train. I reiterated the help that was needed. Is she going to be able to get to the house by 5:30 when he comes home? That and on Sunday nights I will require her to sleep over. She will be here a month before Dad can even think of coming home. That is no help. I told her that I will need to beg for help the second month he is home and she leaves.

Today I have to figure out if he can get paid family leave from Massachusetts as his job does not have disability or workman's comp. Someone of the LVad face book page from Massachusetts said I need to create an account with the state before I can even see any of the forms. The Lvad team just told me to go to the website and they should help me. I went and no help. I can't call today as it is a holiday. That and the office closes by the time I get home from work. I need some Money to cover his car, and the various insurance bills. They are about $1000 a month.

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Fri, 13 Feb 2026 18:02:00 GMT

Frankie has been a charming coworker today. I wheeled over the tall chair to my drafting table and made him a bed so he could be with my as I worked...but not sitting on the keyboard.

I have also stopped working since the boss is on vacation in Florida today. She's shopping for a second home for when she retires. She's looking around Tampa.

I have a few more reports to do, but I can do them at my leisure over the weekend.

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Fri, 13 Feb 2026 11:22:26 GMT

I am working from home today. Not really great in my headspace, but the boss will take it away from me if I don't use it and fawn over the ability.

Part of what set me off yesterday was posting my Boss's $35k bonus..but yet I can't get her to her and train me.

I am looking forward to spring. This is always a thing for me. It's why I enjoy doing trips in March. The single digit temps are giving me cabin fever and making my skin so uncomfortable. By May I should know what life will entail and get to my garden. In the meantime I think I want to renew my aquarium membership after school vacation so I can get some humidity and just find peace with the giant tanks. I used to enjoy that a lot.

In a plus thing I found a bunch of low sodium recipes that look good and freeze. I will be making Dad chow and freezing so I can feed him at the hospital and free me up later so I can make meals for me that I like. I like making Asian style foods for me...quick, yummy, and chock a block full of sodium. I also bough some of those super cube freezer things so I can portion Dad's freezer meals.

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Thu, 12 Feb 2026 23:17:03 GMT

I am super discouraged.

I have tried my best to do the right thing. Have common sense. Be responsible.

and I have nothing.

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